I don’t have a problem. I can quit any time I like. I only swipe recreationally. Every five minutes. Maybe I’m in denial. First stage, right?

update: Auto-correct and I are in a toxic relationship. Swiping just enables it. Tried quitting once. Worst 5 minutes of my life.

update: There’s this 12-step program… Step one was turning off predictive text. Didn’t make it to step two.

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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: May 19th, 2024

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  • I believe societal expectations of masculinity and femininity have become distorted over time. Conforming to these rigid categories will just lead to sadness.

    If you’re a woman who enjoys tinkering with electronics, go for it. If you’re a man who feels comfortable expressing your emotions, do so. Why not explore both while you’re at it?

    In matters like these, it’s perfectly fine to disregard cultural norms and follow your own path. There’s no reason to conform to societal expectations that contradict your true self. You don’t need to identify with any specific gender; simply be a human and engage in human activities.

    I think gender has become another “tribe” that people naturally gravitate towards and identify with. It seems quite human to desire such social groupings. Thousands of years ago, your family and literal tribe fulfilled this role. Today, we seek similar social connections through other means.






  • Haven’t asked the admins, but here’s my guess.
    Being the most well known instance means that you get a lot of traffic. Let’s say that 1% of the people using your instance are annoying morons. In a smaller instance that 1% translates to maybe one ban a month or whatever. In a bigger place, it becomes a constant onslaught stupid idiot bullshit nobody has the time or energy to deal with. Either you get a bunch of admins and mods to deal with that nonsense or you start banning users more aggressively. If that doesn’t help, you may need to look at the instance where those troublemakers come from. If you notice that a particular instance pops up disproportionately often, you might want to consider defederating from it.

    However, some part of that drama is public on fediseer. Have a look. Just scroll down to censures given and read the reasons why lemmy.world has defederated from so many instances.


  • I took a look at those stats a while back, and the defederation procedure totally goes both ways.

    As far as I can tell, bigger instances have bumped into issues that were resolved through defederation. Smaller instances haven’t faced those kinds of problems, so they haven’t defederated with any instances yet.

    If all the big instances have defederated your instance, that’s clear sign that there might be something wrong with that place. If your instance has defederated from a bunch of other instances, take a look at the size of that instance before drawing conclusions. For example lemmy.world is a special case and a clear outlier.