Since living alone I have been struggling a lot to do anything, because there is so much to do all the time and I get overwhelmed and have no one to tell me what I need to do next. My friends and therapist tell me I need to prioritize tasks, but I don’t know how and they can’t help me with daily decisions, only give general advice that hasn’t been super helpful.
For example, at the moment there is a pile of dishes I need to do, there are some emails I have to answer, I have to make two doctor’s appointments, I need to buy a present for a friend, I need to write an essay, and so on. I can’t do all of this today and don’t need to, but all of it is important and and every task has a different (often ambiguous) deadline and nothing is so urgent I need to do it right now. But I do have to start with something, plan some time for longer tasks (like writing the essay) otherwise I will run out of time, but I don’t know how so the stress builds up and in the end I don’t do anything and just lie in bed all day. Sometimes if I have a lot of energy (which happens on a good day every few weeks) I try to get everything done at once and usually overwork myself and get a migraine and lose 3 days again because I’m not able to work at all during that time.
I’ve been recommended Goblin Tools and it helps with breaking down tasks into smaller ones, but it doesn’t help with what to prioritize. I already have 3 different planners to keep track of everything and that also helps, at least with not forgetting appointments and stuff, but it doesn’t help with daily planning and getting into a routine, at least not as much as I would need.
I have less support then I used to and won’t be able to get more in the forseeable future, unfortunately. So if you have any tools and/or strategies you could recommend that don’t rely on other people reminding me, that would be great!
I like the pomodoro technique. Breaks your time up into focussed chunks so you guarantee to make some progress on one thing within a chunk and helps build momentum.
If you get into routine you may even be able to plan whole days e.g. spend 8 pomodoros on your essay and the remaining pomodoros can be distributed across chores, other small admin.
The focus helps avoid overwhelm. You can put other concerns out of your mind whilst in a pomodoro as you know they will get their own pomodoro later.
Can also be adjusted for your energy levels, maybe some days you’re only going to get a few pomodoros done but that’s ok, you’re still moving forward.
The regular enforced breaks are also helpful to avoid sitting still for too long and paying attention to bodily needs.
Doesn’t help with prioritisation directly but knowing you’ve got a fixed number of daily pomodoros to ‘spend’ may help you think about where your time goes in a systematic manner.
Thank you for the tip, that could probably help with time blindness as well. I think I will get an alarm clock for that, so I can’t get distracted by my phone as easily!