So I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow to follow up on my septoplasty recovery, and I am really worried about it. One of my reasons is valid, and the other is just plain stupid.
I’ll start with the stupid one first. Literally the main thing that scares me about doctors visits, is being called back by the nurse. I don’t know why I always find it so loud and intimidating, and when they say your name, everybody stares at you. It was so nice when I have my CT scan and there was literally nobody there, plus, I had a very quiet and wonderful nurse. Unfortunately, this time I’m at one of the main locations, which has a bigger lobby and louder nurses. Normally, I’m not this worried, but today for some reason, I cannot stop thinking about it.
The second reason I’m worried, Is because my doctors going to be putting a metal wand up my nose to see how the septum is healing. I’ve had this done before, And it all ends up being ok. I just get so worried about it since I don’t like being touched with metal, especially in a sensitive area like my nose. Plus, they give me numbing spray before hand, Which goes in my nose and down my throat. It does not taste good at all but luckily, goes away fast.
I’ve always struggled with doctors visit since I became an adult. Having to check myself in, be called back and having to go back there by myself, having tools poked at me constantly and being told stuff I don’t always understand is very difficult for me. I’m trying to make it easier by reminding myself That I’ll be going to dinner with my mom afterwards Instead of going back to college, and then grocery shopping with her, which I love doing. However, I’m still very concerned.
Does anyone else feel this way about doctor’s appointments?
I think I am ok with doctors I trust, but with the way that doctors are spread so thin, it’s hard to even get the same general practice provider every time. Not to mention the push for PAs to do annual physicals by corporate owned clinics to save money meaning I don’t get to build a relationship with a doctor anymore.
My issues are more around doctors not understanding that I don’t express pain or discomfort non-verbally and it’s easy for them to talk me into thinking it’s “not that bad” even with severe pain. Add to that that I’m not good at verbal communication in finding the right words to express things. I’ve tried expressing this to doctors up front, but they seem to tend to fall back on assuming people are over-reporting issues when I’m always under-reporting. That discomfort then makes me have issues with every appointment since I know they’re going to manipulate me into saying I’m not uncomfortable. I miss my old GP who would spend lots of time with me and support me by helping me by believing me, and digging into issues to help me express myself with specialists.