as said previously I’m a nurse, which means the overwhelming majority of employees are women. Gossiping, being unauthentic, cattiness and passive aggressiveness is a daily occurrence.
My current unit: there are 2 men that seem to be completely stoic (I don’t know what word would describe them better): they ignore drama and jabs, even if directed at them, they are punctual with their pauses, I mean really, 30 minutes and that’s it, and can ignore when other coworkers lazy around, even if it means they have to be the ones doing most of the work, extra work they don’t receive any extra money or recognition for.
I am writing in awe, because as much as I’d like to be this thick skinned, I am not. The feeling of being treated unfairly rubs me the wrong way really fast. My strategy so far has been to lazy around so much as my direct coworkers, even if they’re part of an established group at the ward I don’t belong to. They’re the ones supposed to be showing me around and teach me. If they don’t work, why should I?
I believe this is a trait of mine, something nearly impossible to change, it would make more sense to change the setting than trying to change me, to change jobs. I don’t know how to play this game where I am, in a workplace where most employees are women.
But my question remains to all of you who are this thick skinned: how? I don’t understand it. Don’t you find it tiring? Doesn’t it make you feel like shit when you go back home? Don’t you feel taken advantage of?
As an almost 40 year old man who has worked a few years in different kinds of healthcare (including being the only man in a retirement home). I would get pissed when people being lazy caused suffering (because of lack of care) but that never gave me the go ahead to do the same. I’m better than that.
I also started my job journey working in factories, wielding shops and construction sites. In factories you learn to count every minute and be extremely punctual. You know how many seconds more you can chat before you get a backlog and shit from the boss.
In shops and construction sites people will chew you out and really ostracise you if you don’t carry your weight.
But mostly: Is my job to actually be working during my working time and I don’t give a fuck about what Karen thinks about stuff, she’s shit at everything anyway