I don’t have wide feet, just long ones! But that’s great info for others :)

I literally used that as a selling point for myself in an interview a couple weeks ago, when they asked how I would cross the generational divide while offering mentoring to high schoolers.

I got the job xD

I have large feet for my height (163cm, women’s US 12) and tend to just wear men’s shoes now. I have never had someone notice my feet are atypically sized, but it still feels like I’m wearing clown shoes if I wear Chucks or other canvas shoes.

You’ll want to avoid pointed toes, and narrow styles, these are designed to elongate. Any kind of heel rise will shorten the length of your footprint, I personally prefer chunky heels to balance it out. I tend to wear moto style boots the most, just to throw a style name out there

There are actually more unisex styles in men’s larger sizes out now than when I first started doing this (about 15 years ago). When I still wanted femme shoes I ended up buying from people who custom made drag queen shoes. It’s still uncommon to find cute heels in my size in the wild.

Edit: I forgot to mention that all the style mags in the 00s (at least) were talking about elongating the leg-toe line, because psychologically it demonstrates dominance and power. (please remember the opening to The Devil Wears Prada for an example xD) So if/when you have the energy and desire for it, own it. None of the other women in your vincinity have that kind of power play ability!

The best hugging pillow I ever had was a ridiculously large plushie, because the fill density was different. I haven’t figured out the head pillow yet, because sometimes as a side sleeper I try to hug those, too. I’ve mostly landed on ignoring the shaped memory foam pillows, because even if it says “for side sleepers” it usually feels better using as a traditional sleeper

I looked up names with meanings that spoke to me, then when I had a few I asked my bestie to help me narrow them down. She also made a gender neutral nickname out of my first name, which is what I usually go by. I love that I get to use a name she picked!

You might like my middle name, it means “island goddess”, but most English speaking people have no idea how to pronounce it lol

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I’m not a cis man, but every man I’ve dated has had “friends”, but not people they can really talk to. Like, one guy I dated had a really big social circle and they regularly had gaming events. But he didn’t text or talk to anyone outside of planning and going to those events. Others had maybe one friend that they hung out with outside of work.

It is sad. And it was jarring when I was young, because I had lots of friends I could turn to on a bad day or for something more serious. It makes me so angry with “the patriarchy”, because it isn’t just keeping women down, it’s also hurting and sometimes killing men.

I had a cat die a very painful and sad death right in the veterinarian’s parking lot. I was completely devastated, but my poor boyfriend kept trying to hold back his tears because he “needed to be strong” for me. Bitch no, cry with me, that was super heavy. I’m going to carry that death with me until I die, and not just because my cat didn’t deserve that. It’s not fair for men to have this expectation that they need to hold back expressing emotion so they appear strong. (that particular ex also has a fear of dying, so he really needed to and should have felt free to express himself at that time)

The sheer number of men who suddenly have no support in their life because their relationship has ended, that soon struggle with suicidal thoughts should really point to the first thing you said. Men and women are socialized differently as children and this is one of the most common results when we reach adulthood. It will take an enormous shift in society and ingrained values to fix that

That second point, yeah, women don’t need to get married to survive now. My grandmother couldn’t have her own bank account when she was a young adult, and banks would have laughed her out of town if she wanted a mortgage. My parents got married young because that was still kind of expected, especially in rural America. I haven’t dated in years, because it’s frustrating, and I have been able to, and lucky enough, to buy a home on my own finances. That’s not high standards, it’s just that I didn’t need to get hitched to have financial stability

I met two people with my dead name and a third who used the nickname I used to (think Christina/Tina) all in the same job. I thought it would be weird, but I realized that I never identified with those names, I just used them because it was expected.

I imagine it’s different for other people, but that’s how it has been for me

There are programs for people with felonies to find jobs, typically found under “re-entry” or “second chance”. They’re often sucky, poorly paid jobs though.

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My 16yo cat is definitely a prim and proper old lady. Oddly, I call the 4yo Maine Coon “little man” even though he’s easily 4x the old lady’s size

I’m probably forever going to call my dog “bestest girl”, but she’s starting to get a grey muzzle too

Right? The text service I use doesn’t allow video. Sometimes it won’t allow large photos either lol

Honestly, I may have gotten lucky because I didn’t need to do much rust removal. Took them outside and hosed them down, then got to work removing the burnt in bits and evening out the seasoning. Took me about two afternoons per pan. One of the pans is definitely an antique, so I haven’t used it because it might have lead in it

When I bought my house I discovered a treasure trove of old cast iron pans in the (very modern) oven. They all looked like this and smelled like rancid oil. It was not fun to deal with lol

There’s four justices over the age of 70 (one is Sotomayor). Not that age means much in regards to mortality when one has the resources that they do

I can understand trying to do what you think will get you roles, especially in a current and post-Trump America, but I think diversity is incredibly special. Like, I want to know and understand all of what makes a person the icon that they are, and celebrate it with them.

I’m probably totally biased by the multicultural influences and experiences in my life.

I’ve been patiently waiting for moths pondering orbs