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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: July 7th, 2023

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  • Oy.

    Yes, these self-reporting polls have been used for decade as one measurement device. They were fine when it was self-evident what “smoking”, “drinking”, and “drugs” meant.

    Now the issues are far more complex and nuanced, and we now live in a world where the pharmacological knowledge of today’s random 14yo outshines what I would have learned in 2nd year university in the 90s.

    Kids drink cough syrup recreationally because “that’s not drugs”. We still live in world of denial where benzos are “drugs” but alcohol isn’t because idk I guess the active molecules are suspended in liquid?

    Young people have been propagandized and lied to, to the point many don’t even know if they’re “smoking” or not.


  • As a person with a grab-bag of disorders, I do get it.

    I have been on my own journey of going from a great technical communicator, to a great human communicator. There’s a big difference that I wasn’t able to see before.

    One of the things I’ve discovered is that in irl interactions there is an undesired aspect of “heavy lifting” that has to be done on “your” side. That involves a lot of “listening” to how what you are saying is being received, and then on-the-fly recognizing and adjusting to that.

    I used to resent that and feel I shouldn’t have to and that other people should be able to “hear” me “plainly” without transforming it through their own emotional framework first. I’ve since learned that was naive and self-centered of me - A denial-based assumption on how communication works, that honestly for me looking back, was me being lazy.








  • Not everything is ADHD and I do not mean that as an insult or invalidation of you.

    Some people intuit that “spirit of adventure” means NOT planning every detail, worrying only about essentials, and rolling with the punches. The opposite of “spirit of adventure” is having controlling expectations, task lists, and arbitrary deadlines, over what is supposed to be a pleasurable day.

    I know that I am “wear bathing suit, toss towel in bag, head to beach, figure rest out” type of person. My pleasure of beach day is ruined by 2 days of pre-planning, a day of driving around for supplies, 2 hours of packing, carting coolers of shit to a spot we’re now chained-to, and so forth.

    When planning the activity overwhelms the activity… maybe you’re not the one with the issue.




  • Facebook was a wonderful tool for me for quite a while. It let me build a digital list of my irl “friends” and then I got watch over the years as they posted their most vile and ill-conceived innermost thoughts.

    An excellent tool for seeing what people really think and feel when they’re not “performing” in social settings. Curiously people don’t understand that public posts to a public SM site aren’t anonymous but there’s enough separation from the “real world” that lots of people forget that.

    Just sitting back and watching gave me a lot of insight as to how awful people really are when they “feel like” they aren’t being watched.