One of my favorites, and my BF didn’t get it D:

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says “why the long face? Are you depressed?”

The horse replies “I don’t think I am”

At which point, the horse promptly disappears.

Now, if you’re at all familiar with the works of Rene Descartes, you’re likely chuckling at this point, knowing his famous quote “I think, therefore I am”

But to tell you that first would have been to put Descartes before the horse.

My mom and I moved to a new apartment, leaving behind basically everything we owned when I was about 17.

We made a post on Craigslist that said basically “in need of a couch, new apartment, single mom, can’t afford much but can pay up to 30 dollars”

We got dozens of emails. People telling us we could have tables, chairs, pots and pans, clothes… They furnished our entire apartment for nothing.

You know how if you’re reading a headline from the onion and you mistake it for real you’ve “eaten the onion?”

Is there a name for the reverse phenomenon? Where a real headline reflecting actual reality is so ridiculous that you reject it out of hand as satire only to realize it was genuine? Regurgitating the onion? What’s the name for this?

I did Nazi that joke coming…

I wish my fingerprint scanner worked D:

Honestly, the only two problems I have had at all are fingerprint scanner (like, lowest priority for me), and the battery continues to drain quickly even when I close the laptop or put it in sleep mode or whatever it’s called

Tried to figure out how to post this comment a couple times without it sounding like proselyting my own view point. Can’t manage it. So I’ll just add this here: that’s not what I’m doing! I’m not attempting to convince anyone of anything. Lol.

I’m a nondualist. Panentheism, to be more specific. I believe that existence is God’s way of experiencing. In other words, we are not just ourselves, and not just reincarnated as the next thing down the line, or spending eternity in heaven. But that every creature, every rock, every thing that has ever or will ever exist is you. You are Ghandi, and you’re also your own mother. You’re hitler, and you’re Stalin. You are God. And in between, after, and before, when you’re in that state of being without limitations, without boundaries and illusions of duality and separateness, you are fully aware of every thing you have been and will be. You understand all.

It brings me comfort. It has allowed me to come to peace with the fact that I will die some day. It hasn’t given me peace for the people I have lost, but I try to remember them as the forms of God I love best, and the forms of God that knew me best. One day I will be gone, and I will dissolve back into the divine, and I won’t be so sad about losing those forms and those people, because I will be with them, as them, and know them better than I could ever have in this form.

As a little aside, another way I like to look at this is through a Betty White quote. She once asked her mother what happens after we die, and her mother told her it was a secret. So whenever Betty lost someone she would say to herself “they learned the secret today”

The secret is that you get to learn everything, at least as far as I believe.

… Yeah. I’m blocking you. You’re deeply awful.

Jesus Christ. Is there some kind of medication you’re supposed to be taking that you haven’t? Or perhaps a medication you’re not supposed to be taking that you have taken too much of?

Re read what I said. I specifically said if they had that interest. My original comment was mostly agreeing with you that if they had that interest is when the concern kicks in. Seriously. You’re so busy attempting to defend yourself that you’ve blinded yourself to the fact that no one was attacking you. Fucking chill.

Firstly, that is how memory loss works. If they’re a person who has a prexisting interest or history in a thing, in a moment of confusion they may well forget that it’s not a good idea for them to go do that thing again.

Secondly, I’m not making it about me. I’m using myself as an example.

Thirdly, there’s no “again” here. This was our first interaction about this.

Finally, the person who asked the question is clearly concerned about this aspect. You making this about YOU and YOUR assumptions on their history, personality, and general ethos does not help a person who is genuinely seeking help. Perhaps try answering their question (“how do I ensure I am on a no-purchase list for firearms?”) instead of attempting to make this more than it is and making this a “the psychology of gun owners” debate?

Perhaps they’ve been a gun owner in the past. I’m as lefty as they come, and I have owned guns in the past, and plan on having a gun again. There are people who hunt, who live in areas with bear and other dangerous animals, and there are those who have worked in fields where firearms are something you have. I have worked armed security. I enjoy going to gun ranges (though, as a general rule, I no longer do that. Too many dipshit right wing stains on humanity hang out there). I lived in a very rural area until April, and we would often target shoot out in the back yard. Owning a gun in the US is so normalized that if OP is in the US, and anywhere outside of major urban centers (and even then…), it is very possibly a concern that if they are not in their right mind, just popping down the local gun store (and there is almost always at least one local gun store around) or pawn shop, and pick up a 9mm or a .38 special. If I ever got a dementia diagnosis, this would also be a major concern for me. I would give my power of attorney to whoever I trusted most, and make sure the state was alerted that I should not be trusted with a weapon again. I’ve never considered this aspect until now, but OP is exactly right. It’s far too commonplace a thing not to worry that in an episode you won’t just go do that in the States. Our gun culture is absolutely insane.

Also, before the accusations fly:

There have been no children in the home The guns are in lock boxes Ammunition is stored separately I am not a “but the home invasions!” Nutjob

Me and my brother and my sister in law are visiting Miami right now. He asked when the last time I was here was, I say 2012, when he and I came down. Hours later we were talking and we realize we all three came down after that.

None of us can remember when. It was some time after 2017 but before 2019. Only problem is, it almost definitely couldn’t have happened during those dates, but that are the only date between which it could have happened.

I had fully forgotten the phrase “you’ll tie up the phone line!” And I just had a nam style flashback of sneaking internet time during the day when my mom was at work, and praying that no one tried to call

See, I know you y’all were separate people. But then y’all got Tuvix’d and now you’re just trying to maintain the illusion of the originals so you don’t get fully murdered like the original Tuvix.

What nursery rhyme taught you this?

You say that, but if the alternative is a completely paralyzed body stuck in a bed 24/7, with sores on your back, ass, and thighs, and no recourse? I’d take rectal itch and tooth rot. If I can afford a brain transplant in the US healthcare system, I can afford dentures and a calamine enema

On #6, I’ve been using a variation I read recently. “If someone said that about [friend] would you defend them?”

It has helped a lot. I’ve realized in the last month especially that the way I treat myself, the thoughts I have about myself, are borderline abusive. If I were in a relationship with someone and they expected of me what I give myself shit for doing/not doing, they’d 100% be a toxic and abusive partner. If someone openly talked about my friends the way my brain talks about me, I’d knock their teeth out. Just because it’s coming from inside doesn’t mean it’s not abusive. Don’t let your mind abuse you, because that POS will try every time if you let it.

Everybody gets together, there are snacks and drinks and music, and then at the stroke of midnight all the software turns to hardware and by 12:03 everyone releases simultaneously

“We shouldn’t be setting bones and giving people casts. Just imagine how much more reckless people will be if they don’t have the threat of deformity and lifelong pain!”

Let people have nice teeth, even if maybe they didn’t take the greatest care or them as young folks, or grew up eating highly acidic foods or drinking soda.

It’s so good, isn’t it?

Yorkshire. Jodie Whitaker’s accent. Fucking love it so much. The way she says radio in the Tesla episode? OMG. I love everything about it.

Also genuinely love Indian accents, and several southern US accents, but not all of them. Not a big fan of Appalachian or west Virginian accents, Kentucky can okay depending on the region, and coastal Virginia is pretty good. Western Virginia (not west Virginia, but the mountainous western portion of Virginia) can be grating to me.

Charleston accents are chef’s kiss, and the accent I was born into until I forced myself into a general American accent as a kid