I will try to keep an open heart. Fwiw I used to have the same low self esteem, and still do needlessly stick my neck out to be chopped by others in moments where I don’t believe in myself and want to prove my fealty to others through peity…
I can only say this after decades of experience: don’t put yourself down, even jokingly, in front of others. You may think that you’re telegraphing humility or a lack of arrogance, but all you’re actually doing is showing others how to treat you. Don’t do it.
That’s easier said than done - the low self esteem and the fear of rejection is an integral part of my personality (AvPD is a bitch), but since the same fear of rejection causes me to just break off relationships, i rarely encounter those situations nowadays.
Oh wow, I wish I saw this wikipedia article a few years ago. This was (is still partially) me to a Tee!
All I can say is: get your heart broken, be laughed at, endure ridicule, and come out the otherside a broken, jaded, dejected better and stronger person :-)
I will try to keep an open heart. Fwiw I used to have the same low self esteem, and still do needlessly stick my neck out to be chopped by others in moments where I don’t believe in myself and want to prove my fealty to others through peity…
I can only say this after decades of experience: don’t put yourself down, even jokingly, in front of others. You may think that you’re telegraphing humility or a lack of arrogance, but all you’re actually doing is showing others how to treat you. Don’t do it.
Sorry for the preachy comment
That’s easier said than done - the low self esteem and the fear of rejection is an integral part of my personality (AvPD is a bitch), but since the same fear of rejection causes me to just break off relationships, i rarely encounter those situations nowadays.
I wish you happy holidays!
Oh wow, I wish I saw this wikipedia article a few years ago. This was (is still partially) me to a Tee!
All I can say is: get your heart broken, be laughed at, endure ridicule, and come out the otherside a
broken, jaded, dejectedbetter and stronger person :-)Happy holidays to you too fellow AvPDer!