I genuinely care about my friends and family, but I forget to stay in touch and it makes me feel awful.

I’ll go weeks or months without reaching out, not because I don’t care, but because once someone is out of sight they’re out of mind. Then I remember randomly, feel guilty, and put it off again.

I’ve tried reminders, calendars, notes but nothing really sticks long-term. It’s especially frustrating because I do want to maintain these relationships, it’s like my brain just doesn’t cooperate.

Recently I’ve found a mobile app that helps (after rummaging through the useless, overwhelming ones) but I’m curious does anyone else struggle with this? Have you found anything that actually helps, or is this just one of those ADHD things you learn to live with?

Edit: For everyone asking the app is called Kinly Connect

  • LouNeko@lemmy.worldEnglish
    47·
    2 days ago

    I always keep thinking: “A phone works both ways.”
    If I’m not reaching out, then what stops them from doing so? Oh, right…

    • AddLemmus@lemmy.mlEnglish
      3·
      2 days ago

      Exactly - my “autistic unload” is not really that interesting, and it’s hard to be my friend. All while I am having a hard time to understand and process their situation and FEEL something about it. Got to keep myself off calling people just because they expressed interest in something I did or said at some point. If I called the last 2 or 3 times, it’s time for them to make a move.

      Pair that with various coping characteristics developed through decades, and I can be an annoying friend at times.

      • LouNeko@lemmy.worldEnglish
        4·
        2 days ago

        From my experience, if the guy you’ve known since High-school, who you’ve been the best man at his wedding - if that guy first ghosts you when you wanna hang out and then proceeds to say “Next weekend, I’m gonna make time, just for you.” and then you text him up on Thursday to ask if he’s still up to hang on the weekend, and he says “Woops, sorry something else came up.” 4 WEEKENDS IN A ROW, then maybe, just maybe, you’ve reached a point where you lived yourselves apart.

        Seriously, I know I’m not the most important thing in anyone’s life, but I didn’t want to find out first hand how unimportant I truly am. Ignorance is bliss.

        PS: If that first sentence were any longer, it would reach the moon.