This guy is 38 and she was part of some chatroom and he started talking to her 13 year old little sister in a way that very obviously had ill intent. She called him out on this and posted screenshots of that chatroom online. Now ever since this, he has a site where he archives almost everything she says online. She made a post about how she prefers cats over dogs, then he archived that and posted the link to the archive on his site saying “never trust a dog hater with anything” and it just goes on, and on, and on for years.
When she even makes a passing mention about him, even if he’s not named or only vaguely mentioned, he chimes in, and posts a link to his site with some variation of “don’t trust her, she’s not to be trusted” and links to pages on his site which were all made by him over the years in an attempt to maliciously discredit her. It’s often a gish-gallop of links.
He also says that he’s made an account on every site he knows of, likely in an attempt at surveilling or intimidating her.
She’s the victim here and shouldn’t need to do any of this.
Everyone regardless of victim status should use the tools available to protect their personal information online.
If someone is publishing your personal information without your consent, local laws and regulations may apply. You kinda have to be lucky with police and the legal system to take you seriously though.
No, no one should feel the need to make their socials private because someone is being an asshole.
This is like saying you dont need to look both ways before crossing the street when you have the crossing signal. Sure, you might be correct but that doesn’t protect you when you get hit by a car.
You need to practice making comparisons. No, that’s nowhere near the same thing.
Here’s a better one: -“Stop wearing short skirts if men are cat calling you”
Yeah, no.
It’s reasonable advice, if you are sure that not wearing short skirts results in less cat-calling. The societal solution is to discourage cat-calling in whatever way. But if a particular individual doesn’t want to be cat called more than they want to wear short skirts, then the solution is obvious.
This is similar advice to “if someone is trying to mug you, just give them your wallet so you don’t get stabbed.” Certainly there should be a larger discussion about decreasing the amount of muggings - but for the particular individual in a particular circumstance, they should take the action that is in their immediate self interest.
No, it’s not. Please tell me you’re not a parent.
So lets hear your solution to the problem if you feel your idealist approach is the most effective way to deal with this.
Let me guess, you’ll suggest going to the police who won’t actually do anything or pay thousands of dollars to hire a lawyer who may or may not be able to accomplish something after months of time and a bunch of court hearings. Maybe even loudly announcing to this mentality ill individual that their behavior is wrong forcing them to back down as everyone around claps for OP? Yeah I’m not so sure that’s how things work in the real world.
Nobody is blaming the victim here but we don’t live in a fairytale world where good always triumphs over evil and justice is always served. You need to do what you can to protect yourself and we’re simply offering real solutions.
Yeah, you go to the police and fheir hosting provider. At no point do you teach women that the right action when bullied is for them to take a step back and be quiet.
In a world where justice is guaranteed, you’d be right. But we’re not living in a fairy tale, and keeping all your data public is not bringing us closer to that utopia, so what’s the point?
I live in a country where all data is public. We’re good, thanks.
What the fuck does that even mean?
You want someone’s personal number (americans, think social security number) - call the tax authority and ask for it. While at it, ask how much their declared income is and where they live.
All public information. And our society is most definitely a fairy tale utopia compared to the US.
I’m going to assume that that personal number is not used for identification then. But the information you name are not really relevant for the kind at stalking that OP describes. It’s not like the are no stalkers in Sweden.
Agreed, not just because someone is being an asshole. Everyone should feel the need to protect their personal information, because the world is full of assholes of different levels and your personal information being publicly available can only cause harm to you. It really is as simple as setting your profile to “friends only” to counter the lowest level of assholes.