38, great at masking. I work in a highly social enviornment (hospo) and have been for ~20 years.
Makes me feel like a sociopath but, people are relatively basic. A few quirky comments or general niceties go a long way for directing interactions the way you want them to transpire.
Its not been without its issues / hardships, lots of socially exhausted days, awkward interactions and one complete breakdown for 6 months. Saying so I’m well ontop of interacting with the humans and knowing my social limits / when I’m going overboard in a conversation but man it’s taken me a while.
I can very much relate to feeling like a sociopath. But masking is a form of disassociation, so I can’t really help it if I don’t feel a lot of the emotions I put on. And after doing that for a long time, I started picking up on the grander strokes of conversation. It makes me very guilty that I ever even think about how I could manipulate the conversation when I’m detached from it.
That’s an interesting way of looking at interactions with people.
The fact that we can be so detached and yet so involved, I don’t feel the guilt is justified.
Were not cut of the same cloth as lots of folks, and in order to cope with the sometimes difficult interactions we lead or drop a conversation to cope, letting us cope in our own way. Leaving them blind to what were actually experiencing.
Were trying to fit in and the guilt is on them not us, don’t feel guilt for being different.
Its a wild ride, since being diagnosed i’ve more embraced it than hidden it, but it has opened my eyes to who I am and how awful some people are.
38, great at masking. I work in a highly social enviornment (hospo) and have been for ~20 years.
Makes me feel like a sociopath but, people are relatively basic. A few quirky comments or general niceties go a long way for directing interactions the way you want them to transpire.
Its not been without its issues / hardships, lots of socially exhausted days, awkward interactions and one complete breakdown for 6 months. Saying so I’m well ontop of interacting with the humans and knowing my social limits / when I’m going overboard in a conversation but man it’s taken me a while.
I can very much relate to feeling like a sociopath. But masking is a form of disassociation, so I can’t really help it if I don’t feel a lot of the emotions I put on. And after doing that for a long time, I started picking up on the grander strokes of conversation. It makes me very guilty that I ever even think about how I could manipulate the conversation when I’m detached from it.
That’s an interesting way of looking at interactions with people.
The fact that we can be so detached and yet so involved, I don’t feel the guilt is justified.
Were not cut of the same cloth as lots of folks, and in order to cope with the sometimes difficult interactions we lead or drop a conversation to cope, letting us cope in our own way. Leaving them blind to what were actually experiencing.
Were trying to fit in and the guilt is on them not us, don’t feel guilt for being different.
Its a wild ride, since being diagnosed i’ve more embraced it than hidden it, but it has opened my eyes to who I am and how awful some people are.