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Joined 8 months ago
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Cake day: November 15th, 2024

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  • Yup, it absolutely crushes them to not only think that someone would actively reject masculinity, but it also can trigger some serious issues questioning their sexuality when they’re attracted to a transwoman. It’s kind of a “Hurt itself in its confusion” moment because their internal crisis could be fixed by just saying “Yeah, I like women and she is a woman” but instead have this deep sense of self-hatred because they’re attracted to “a guy”.

    It’s also part of the reason they really don’t give a shit about transmen. It’s understandable they’d want to want to be a man, because of course they would, being a man is awesome! They don’t have to question their sexuality, because even if they’re super masc, they’re still a woman, so they’re definitely not even a little gay.




  • I can really only answer the first two or three as I was already on my own when I was out/transitioned.

    1. There’s a lot of internalized transphobia that definitely makes this really challenging early on. I had a buddy who’s dad loved to say shit like “I’m a teenage lesbian trapped in a man’s body” and it always felt super icky. I definitely feel that ick waning as I transition, but there are still those “man pretending to be a woman” brainworms that bug me from time to time.

    2. I feel like at least half the trans people I know are on the spectrum, so you’ll fit right in lol.

    3. I can at least give a bit of insight on this one, as I unfortunately hid things, just not from my parents.

    Undergarments and women’s cut clothes are really nice and not necessarily noticeable to those around you. It’s subtle, but the difference between a women’s and men’s tee makes a significant difference for how I see myself, but others are unlikely to notice.

    Growing your hair out is another possible option and did wonders for my mental health, while simply using the excuse of wanting to try something new or even just being too lazy/busy to get it cut.

    Getting my ears pierced was another small thing that’s pretty common with men too nowadays. Even clip-on earrings are an option if you want to go really incognito.

    Tinted chapstick and similar “not-makeup” cosmetics are again, subtle, but they are small things that add up without being too overt.

    “Feminizing workouts” sound ridiculous, but they can legit give you great hips/butt without hormones. Again, not anything super overt, but I guarantee you’ll notice before anyone else does.







  • The one thing I will add is that the soul searching isn’t always visible, which was what made it so hard for my family/friends to understand when I came out. To them, it seemed like a very sudden and “snap” decision, when the reality was that I had spent years at that point reflecting and doing soul searching, but was so terrified about what it meant and how they might see me, I never told anyone about it.

    I definitely think that this dad did a solid job overall, and even as an adult transitioning in their late 20s, I would have loved this response vs how my parents handled it…







  • They have this twisted idea that basically all transwomen are burly middle-aged dudes doing drag, solely to invade women’s spaces, so it will be no problem when they’re thrown into prison because then they’ll just behave like dudes again since there are no women to sexually assault. It’s even worse because it feels like all the progress we’ve made over the past decade almost makes things worse, with more younger trans women who were able get on puberty blockers and transition early, because they will have zero chance of “boymoding” in prison to try and protect themselves.