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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: April 3rd, 2024

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  • I was Narnia deep in denial, but the signs were there.

    1. I knew I liked guys since I was like five, and even experimented with sex with boys at that age, but it didn’t feel quite right. I do not like gay porn so I can’t be gay, right? Better get a couple kids and a couple wives.
    2. My cousin wanted to put makeup on me and god I wanted that. Didn’t dare to say yes.
    3. Jokes about wanting to wear dresses because they aren’t as restricting as pants and nicer when it’s warm. A lot of similar jokes, you know the ones. “Trying to lose a bit of weight, it’s soon bikini season.”
    4. I think I remember every trans reference I’ve ever heard.
    5. When being depressed I constructed elaborate fantasies about myself as a woman.
    6. Bad mental health
    Tap for spoiler

    I was on suicide watch and during a breakdown blurting out “I’m living a lie” and blam, the mental wall came down. Not an allowed train of thought. Fifteen years later, I finally got it.

    1. Always hating how I looked in the mirror. I recently realized I look kinda hot as a guy. Skinny, androgynous and a nice smile. I’d totally let me do me. Is that weird?
    2. NSFW
    Tap for spoiler

    Cutting off the penis of a male doll. My mum did not react well to that incident. Probably thought I had serial murderer tendencies or something.

    There were other signs too of course.