That’s not what I mean….

I was just listening to a biologist podcast about tardigrades and learnt we’ve been subjecting them to all the extremes to see what they can tolerate: super-fast speeds, radiation, you name it we’ve done it to them…

Think if super-advanced aliens did this to us. Oh. Oh god. ‘How much velocity to squish us?’ ‘How much sound to shake us apart?’

Suddenly anal probing doesn’t seem so bad.

e: ‘we’ll stick an appropriately-sized thing into an orifice that seems made for that’ sounds downright friendly by comparison.

  • HubertManne@piefed.socialEnglish
    401·
    2 days ago

    Heres the thing. Every month, once a month. They probe you and not just them but they hand you around to their friends probing you over and over again. Every month, once a month. And then. for no reason. they stop. You never hear from them again. No calls. No text. No email. Nuthin. Totally ghosted. wtf!

      • Mac@mander.xyzEnglish
        7·
        2 days ago

        Oh, i can take your info here, actually.
        Please provide:

        Pseudonym: __________

        Instance: ____________

        Date of Birth: _________

        Desired Frequency:
        - [ ] Twice-monthly
        - [ ] Monthly
        - [ ] Bi-monthly
        - [ ] Hexa-monthly

        Probe Style Preference:
        - [ ] Synthetic
        - [ ] Biological

        Filling and sending the form will constitute consent for further contact

        Privacy Policy

        We will put your information in an unsecured Firebase storage bucket for the 'Channers to access