So here I am, pretty confident in what I am but diagnosis is upcoming but not yet done.
Still, for different reasons I am in therapy. It happens to revolve around generic stuff which might be useful for people who don’t know themselves very well or have suppressed emotions or other stuff. All of which is definetly not me.
Mostly I know what he’s getting at but I feel I am far ahead in my thoughts and out of his league.
I also know what some of the answers are going to be (both sides basically) but would like to ask for your experience with neurotypical therapists.
In short: I don’t think they have any idea of our scope and can not apply their knowledge appropriately.
Edit: thanks for the answers (so far and maybe following)! The situation I stated left quite a bit out on details, especially the credit that I got on the right path due to the help of the therapy. Apologies for that. However, my focus was on the current state and that’s where I was thinking of asking about your experiences.
I selected my therapist based on her academic background and what she wrote on her website (down to earth, still teaching at Uni, and proficient in trauma therapy based on up to date scientific research, …). I’m in therapy for about 1,5 - 2 years now and one of the questions we discuss every few months is what I currently / still want to achieve and what I think is needed (from therapy / her) to achieve this.
Have you talked to you therapist about you feeling like you are ahead of what he thinks you need?
Otherwise I can imagine that you have “outgrown” his usual therapy scope and that it may be beneficial to look for someone with a better fit, e.g. someone more specialized in your area of need. But I feel like you should reflect your goals (ideally at some point with your therapist) and how they match your current therapy first.
I would love to be able to select. However, our Healthcare has Ben run down so far that you have to be happy and lucky actually to even get a therapy.
The country head authorized to set the amount of available therapy spots has made a legendary remark a while ago that you might just want to drink a beer instead of therapy.
Awesome! Do they pay for the beer at least or is it extra taxed? It’s so nice to be expected to “function” without any support… (ノ｀Д´)ノ彡┻━┻
Do you have the option to work on this as a long term project? Writing e-mails, applying to wait lists, something like that? Or do you get someone assigned and you have to stick with them or don’t get any therapy at all?
I’m from Germany. So the access to therapy in general is easy: I can go to any therapist who’s on the health insurance panel and ask for an appointment. After up to six sessions I’ll need a prescription to continue with therapy (no matter if with this or another therapist).
BUT they limited the therapists “seats” in the health insurance panel to a relatively low number compared to the actual need. So to get an appointment you can either go through your insurance company which practically assignes the next best available therapist from the panel (which may still take months) OR you do a lot of researching, writing e-mails, calling and so on by yourself and may have to wait for months and longer but you have a say in who you get.
Edit: I just saw you older posts and that you already exhausted all these options. I’m sorry for you and my comment wont be of any further help :/
Hello fellow German!
So I guess I hate to break it to you… But this is the local experience.
And now I am also paying for my diagnosis myself because all you can find are waiting lists that don’t take anyone anymore.
Especially for adult diagnosis. But I’m getting off topic.
I had this therapy thing with me for a long while and several more or less catastrophic tries. Others I know had more luck.
Regarding the therapy places that was an official statement like 10 or maybe more years ago. I could not find a link spontaneously but it was one of the reasons for me not to do therapy.
It’s all a long topic and Germanys Healthcare has been good and still provided me support for things I would be broke in other countries, but there is a huge array of things currently where when you actually try go get the service it will be very difficult or even impossible, sadly. That’s why most people don’t see the dire state yet.
Additionally, if I should no longer be able to work then it will just suck to be me (sell house etc), welcome to poverty even if I have been working for decades and it’s no fault of my own.
I didn’t even touch on the subject of asking people needing help to do research and as you stated it basically full-time job like look for support… especially regarding being on the spectrum. Makes me mad.
And then you read those support ads everywhere. Don’t kill yourself, there is support. Yeah…
I’m a different flavor of neurospicy, but I had an extremely positive experience with a therapist who specialized in it. I think it’s important for a therapist to have an understanding of your mindset, and knowledge of common maladaptive patterns that can be related to the unique ways neurodivergent people operate. I don’t think good therapists are that rare, but finding one that’s a good fit for you can take a few tries.
AuDHD who did ~3y in therapy. They specialized in ASD as well.
Experience was great - she was a good fit. Imo therapy is 90% having someone give you another perspective on things (if your environment is fked up, they can tell you what’s normal and what you can do or if you might be overlooking things they can point them out).
Idk your situation but generally I think ppl are in therapy either for the diagnosis, or because you wanna learn and change. So if you only want the diagnosis, limit it to that. If you wanna have therapy for the rest, first make sure you are ready to take someone else’s input and learn from that, but then if it doesn’t work, look for other therapists. Some therapists suck, or sometimes you can get stuck with therapists who don’t get you.
Great to hear!
Let me give a counter argument: everything that annoys you about therapy can be part of therapy. Everything that happens in therapy can and should be part of it. So why not being up the topic of this post with your therapist? How does that make you feel?
Therapy is not really about the therapist. They’re just there to give you a surface to reflect off of.
Exactly, it should be about me and not a standard procedure which seems to be his thing 😉
I do understand the context.
My opinion of therapists is generally low. The profession seems to attract a lot of people who “like talking with people and helping people” (and want to make a professional wage), but just don’t have the temperament, intuition, and/or frankly, the intelligence to do the job well. I’m sure there’s good ones out there, but the demand for good therapy I’m sure is high.
I do think dealing with autistic clients only goes well if they are autistic or have a lot of experience in dealing specifically with them. It’s not an easy mindset to work with if you only have a textbook definition in front of you.
But if you say you have yourself figured out, it should be asked what sort of satisfaction or illumination you are looking for? And is it realistic to expect this stranger, however professional they may be, to be able to give that to you?
Fair questions! The chronology was that when I started I didn’t have everything figured out. But through therapy and his help I got there.
So credit where credit is due - it was the whole progress I made over decades of breakdowns and with his help it hit me.
Still, he is stuck with the classic how does it make you feel stuff which literally never was an issue. But the diagnosis will still take some time even though I am lucky it will be in the foreseeable months. And until then he has the (understandable) opinion that we proceed as if this wasn’t the cause of fatigue and breakdowns.
So I never expected him to help with autism to begin with. It just turned out that the missing piece was autism.
Only bad.
One would just sit and stare at me for half an hour as I completely carried the conversation.
Another tried to upsell me acupuncture at “her friend”.Oh dear, selling services.
Were they specialised on ASD diagnosis?
No; they had nothing to do with my diagnosis.
