I made a similar post a few weeks ago, but just remembered that the last time I had friends was over ten years ago, when I was ten.
My whole life at the moment is going to work during the week and being too exhausted for anything for the rest of the day and having no motivation to do anything on the weekends.
The only people around me are my family and my colleagues. Nobody asks how I am or is otherwise interested about me.
I don’t know why I should continue to live, I don’t see many reasons for it
My teens and 20s were similar. I did have one friend off and on in middle and high school, but more because I tolerated him more than others did than because he cared about me. Things improved later in life once I found an extrovert who was good at gathering people and put a lot of effort into being one of the people who shows up to a lot of her events even when my energy is low. I’m AuDHD, and have a very taxing job so it takes a lot, but it’s been well worth it. It also helped that I switched from looking for a partner(s) to looking for friends which might later become partners. Having a partner who isn’t a friend but being obligated to spend a majority of time with them was a big problem.
(I eventually transitioned to ethical non monogamy, but that’s another subject, but for me it meant finding friends and partners was the same thing essentially. Especially when I abandoned the conditioning of relationship escalators, stopped being envious of partners, and stopped needing to hate partners after breaking up.)
I still have almost no energy for friends during the week, but make sure to plan well in advance and reserve energy or take time off if needed to attend regular events. This still isn’t enough social interaction for me, but the stress of the transition stuff and a major promotion at work with tons more responsibility this year has made it all I could handle. Especially after some major relationship drama tied to starting my transition last year.
Anyway, long story…well…it’s hard transitioning from school life where you’re forced together with people, to work life where positive, lasting bonds are much less likely to happen, but it still takes most of your social energy. So, getting adopted by people who thrive on social gatherings and are good at bringing people together is the way to go, but you have to be reliable to keep getting invited to things. And you aren’t likely to create a tight bond with the organizer, that type often isn’t good at deep lasting, bonds but the people they gather around them often are seeking those types of bonds.
The advice about sticking to an extroverted person is probably what saved me from sliding into Kiaras situation too badly.
Helped lots with networking and learning social skills. It also helped a lot that they were a really patient and accepting person, so me being me didn’t “scare” them off.