I always got called out for being weird throughout my life but NOBODY ever mentioned to me they thought I was so I just got exhausted of being misunderstood and misinterpreted sometimes and tried learning the social etiquette my entire life, somethings I don’t necessarily agree but I do it anyway and try understanding others doing for the sake of fitting in and I just got quite used to it, miserable at times yes, but it’s become my life all of that and any quirkness I just assumed to be due to having more individuality than others since no one ever questioned me directly if I had anything other than just plainly calling me weird. I’ve honestly been hopeless with life more than I’d like to admit so I’m not sure how I’m going to process all of this, I figured if anyone could understand or relate to this life experience I have would be others diagnosed as well, has it been like this for everyone here and felt this same way when diagnosed (for those who were diagnosed after already becoming adults)? I’m overwhelmed and needed to talk to someone about this but I have no one other than my psychologist however I’m not comfortable discussing it with her right now about it and since Lemmy is semi-anonymous/anonymous I feel a bit more inclined to talk about it here 😞
Hey! When I got diagnosed, I felt quite miserable and lost. I’ve went through the pandemic very lonely and depressed. I still struggle with a lot of things. When I got diagnosed I remember I almost found it funny how little changed for me. I knew I was still the same person. I also felt strange to come to terms that a lot of the things I struggle with will never really go away.
But after a long time of reflecting/learning/forgiving I am starting to tell apart my talents and my weaknesses (which often are quite close to one another) and I feel like my life is getting a direction again. I recently made friends who accommodate me and I am working towards finding the kind of niche I can work in professionally.
As others have said, being diagnosed isn’t going to change your life. You will always be you. The only thing different will be that you will have a better understanding of yourself. Why certain things bother you or are stressful. And perhaps how to better deal with them. You might still have to struggle with social situations. But now you will know why. And others might too, and have understanding for it. Rather than think you mean something else by it. Which honestly can be a little life-changing in and of itself ironically.
Right! Take a deep breath. You are the same person that you were yesterday, in that, the diagnosis means very little. I had no emotional response to my adult diagnosis either, though it has had an impact down the line that i’m still processing.
I too was the weird kid, now I’m just eccentric and mostly harmless. Accept yourself for who you are, the world needs more interesting people and if those in your circle can’t accept you, you deserve to find yourself a better circle.
Talk, friend. It may be cathartic, or you may work something out for yourself and find a new path. It’s all good
Being ND in a Neuroboring world will likely always be difficult, do what you can to make it easier without compromising yourself. - I’ve stopped masking, and don’t care that much if I cause a little disruption!
Thanks for the advices, I think it’ll take a long while for me to feel comfortable not masking any longer though but it’s nice to those things, in regard about circle I actually kept mine worsening during the pandemic and afterward I probably have fault in losing it honestly but I was usually the one helping others to keep in contact and no one tried once after to do that for me so I still didn’t put too much effort into making a new circle or inserting myself into one, it’s just become exhaustive and I probably should take better care of my mental health because I have been quite a downer and hopeless of life lately (not because of being diagnosed, but before that already)
Everything you say here, I have felt and am feeling as well. Before the pandemic I went out with friends and had fun. Now it’s so hard to deal with other people, it makes me so tired to fake being like them, and I beat myself up when I realise I didn’t mask well enough. It’s like the pandemic made my symptoms worse, but I think it’s just lack of practice. Also maybe burnout over everything else going on in the world.
You’re not alone bud; now you know why things have been so tough your whole life, just like us. You’re part of a big cool club 😂
“We didn’t know what to do with you when you were a kid.” My mom told me this when I was 32. I am undiagnosed and will probably never seek out a diagnosis. I don’t need one to know what I am, but that doesn’t mean it’s not helpful for others. Just knowing was a big step. This allowed me to look at things with a different perspective and by joining a community that understands what I am dealing with I have learned new skills to deal with the world. So just being here is a great start.
I didn’t get even that 😞 thanks for sharing and for the advice, it’s a lot to take finding out about it when I’m already an adult
In my 50s, just realised and self diagnosed in the last few months. Also feeling a bit lost, life would have been so much easier if I’d been diagnosed forty years ago. I feel like everybody else knew and didn’t tell me.
life would have been so much easier if I’d been diagnosed forty years ago
That’s the kind of thoughts I have been thinking of a lot, my life would’ve been a lot less stressful too had I known when I was in either primary or high school
I am late self diagnosed. At first day after realisation I got a brain fog from overwhelming, but then it gone and it became better. What to do next is probably learn more about yourself step by step. Further it should become easier with more and more realisation, analyzing and unmasking.
That’s comforting to know, thanks
Hey, I got a late diagnosis too, at 22 more or less. Depending on where you live the official diagnosis can get you some pretty big benefits, I for once have never again paid for public transportation since I got mine
Thanks for letting me know I’ll ask my psychologist when I talk to her again and search about it too, I had no idea of this
