“allow questioning” for things such as our rights to exist with a society respecting of our presence or self-defense.
I never said anything even remotely similar to that, but I suppose how I can you see that as a logical next step. Where I was coming from was rather: if you consider yourself to be in kinship with Hexbear bc of the trans connection then in that case I completely understand your response, and just as readily disagree with it. Fwiw, Ada would as well, I am pretty sure?
The topic under discussion was toxicity, which Hexbear outright revels in at whereas Blåhaj Lemmy I thought was a beacon of shining hope to weed out such and create a truly welcoming atmosphere? (in regards to LGBTQIA+ lifestyle) Lumping the two together would be like saying that you must be best buddies with Donald Trump if you are a man (you = anyone here, non-specifically). Just as there is more than one way to live life, there are more than two sides to every logical position. I think there might be ways for people to co-exist, without Blåhaj Lemmy having to put up with any crap, and vice versa if conservatives wanted to not see that you exist. But seriously, if you are not aware, that’s not what [email protected] is all about - that is only what they claim to be, which is what we might call an “alternative fact”.
Thank you for your politeness even if we did disagree (which I am not certain that we did actually:-).
Fwiw I was not necessarily saying that we MUST or even that we SHOULD welcome mainstream normies here - I do happen to think that, but I have long since given up any hope that it will ever happen. So rather my position here was that we should be honest about what is present vs. not found anywhere in the Fediverse. We do have toxicity here. Even if you think that I personally am the chief source of it… then that still would show that such exists, no? As you open your eyes, perhaps to places best left hidden (and many of which fortunately your instance has already defederated from), you will see that it is quite common. This is a sad fact, but a true one.
if you consider yourself to be in kinship with Hexbear bc of the trans connection then in that case I completely understand your response, and just as readily disagree with it. Fwiw, Ada would as well, I am pretty sure?
Ada thinks Hexbear is a trans instance and it’s rly rly weird. Any time I talk to those guys I think they’re gonna call me a slur
Based on user polling they’re over half non-cis, most of the moderation team is trans. In the broader Lemmy its way more likely I get misgendered or called a degenerate roach.
I’m rly glad Hexbear defederated Blahaj because I just don’t have the bandwidth to deal with those people most of the time. I always feel unsafe around them as a trans woman, and it’s not just the mansplaining and the pig poop balls
Any time I said something they disagreed with on a shared community, I got dogpiled with “um, ackshually” style responses or even called a CIA agent. It felt like a hostile and unforgiving place, where I had to measure up to their standards or I’d just be punished. It was easy to feel like I’d be called a slur if I said something about my experiences as a woman they didn’t like. I stayed quiet about that sort of stuff when I saw them in a thread because I didn’t feel like I could be open, I stuck to things that were less personal to me.
Okay, so you know how a trans woman just explained why she felt unsafe and you called her a reactionary for it? That’s the kind of thing I felt unsafe for
It was easy to feel like I’d be called a slur if I said something about my experiences as a woman they didn’t like.
Weird, because they ban people for that. I’ve been called plenty of hostile shit voicing my experiences as a trans woman in shared lemmy spaces too, and it’s not from hexbear users.
I never said anything even remotely similar to that, but I suppose how I can you see that as a logical next step. Where I was coming from was rather: if you consider yourself to be in kinship with Hexbear bc of the trans connection then in that case I completely understand your response, and just as readily disagree with it. Fwiw, Ada would as well, I am pretty sure?
The topic under discussion was toxicity, which Hexbear outright revels in at whereas Blåhaj Lemmy I thought was a beacon of shining hope to weed out such and create a truly welcoming atmosphere? (in regards to LGBTQIA+ lifestyle) Lumping the two together would be like saying that you must be best buddies with Donald Trump if you are a man (you = anyone here, non-specifically). Just as there is more than one way to live life, there are more than two sides to every logical position. I think there might be ways for people to co-exist, without Blåhaj Lemmy having to put up with any crap, and vice versa if conservatives wanted to not see that you exist. But seriously, if you are not aware, that’s not what [email protected] is all about - that is only what they claim to be, which is what we might call an “alternative fact”.
Thank you for your politeness even if we did disagree (which I am not certain that we did actually:-).
Fwiw I was not necessarily saying that we MUST or even that we SHOULD welcome mainstream normies here - I do happen to think that, but I have long since given up any hope that it will ever happen. So rather my position here was that we should be honest about what is present vs. not found anywhere in the Fediverse. We do have toxicity here. Even if you think that I personally am the chief source of it… then that still would show that such exists, no? As you open your eyes, perhaps to places best left hidden (and many of which fortunately your instance has already defederated from), you will see that it is quite common. This is a sad fact, but a true one.
Ada thinks Hexbear is a trans instance and it’s rly rly weird. Any time I talk to those guys I think they’re gonna call me a slur
Based on user polling they’re over half non-cis, most of the moderation team is trans. In the broader Lemmy its way more likely I get misgendered or called a degenerate roach.
it really sucks that the largest trans communities aren’t federated.
I really resent the cis people showing up to spread obvious lies. it was hexbear that first defedded blahaj because of the toxic behavior primarily from the 196 mods.
You know what? Fair.
I don’t like Hexbear, but r/196 was a toxic cesspool on Reddit, and I’ve always tried to stay clear of the Lemmy version because of it
I’m rly glad Hexbear defederated Blahaj because I just don’t have the bandwidth to deal with those people most of the time. I always feel unsafe around them as a trans woman, and it’s not just the mansplaining and the pig poop balls
can you elaborate, because as a trans woman I’ve not felt unsafe at all.
Any time I said something they disagreed with on a shared community, I got dogpiled with “um, ackshually” style responses or even called a CIA agent. It felt like a hostile and unforgiving place, where I had to measure up to their standards or I’d just be punished. It was easy to feel like I’d be called a slur if I said something about my experiences as a woman they didn’t like. I stayed quiet about that sort of stuff when I saw them in a thread because I didn’t feel like I could be open, I stuck to things that were less personal to me.
Removed by mod
Okay, so you know how a trans woman just explained why she felt unsafe and you called her a reactionary for it? That’s the kind of thing I felt unsafe for
It’s funny how their reaction to you calling them out on dogpilling is to… dogpile on you
lol
Weird, because they ban people for that. I’ve been called plenty of hostile shit voicing my experiences as a trans woman in shared lemmy spaces too, and it’s not from hexbear users.