Non-consensual sex isn’t sex, it is an act of violence.
And I just get shame for no sex at all.
Fuck this timeline. I’m out y’all.
Sex - shame
No sex - shame
Sex with unwilling young teenagers - AT LEAST two different presidents of the united states that we know of.
Wait who’s the second one?
Bubba?
Same. I was shamed by 15 year olds in my first grade of college. Still same, 8 years after. Fuck this life.
Growing up I never heard anything about not fucking people against their will: heard a lot about keeping my legs closed and deserving negative consequences from sex
It’s absolutely the same where I grew up, so sorry you had to deal with that.
In fairness, nobody specifically told me not to kill other folk or set people’s houses on fire or sexually harass folk. What I did have drilled in to me was an idea of mutual respect; personal boundaries; how not to be a complete dickhead (some may say I’ve not learned much at all about that bit); and how to coexist with others to make everyone’s day that little bit easier, regardless of their gender identity.
I can only assume those basic life lessons are either not being driven home as strongly as they should be in modern life; or there’s outside influences drowning out those voices.
I’m sorry to hear that you had some arsehole giving you such poor life “advice” though. I hope it hasn’t defined or shaped your values of intimacy. It’s yet another erosion of (what I’m assuming) are women’s rights from an early age, and it’s bang out of order.
and somehow im the problem when i point this out
No one’s shaming you enough for all the non-consensual sex?
Waiting for you to get attacked by the manosphere for that sentence
On Lemmy? You probably get the absolute worst of it on /c/[email protected] , but you do a good job moderating if it’s here, because it never sticks around long enough for me to see it on there!
People can be ignorant and even sexist without being manosphere. Neither of those strikes me as super Joe Rogan or Ben Shapiro-ey.
But yeah, we’re living in two separate worlds, and when a person ignores what half of us experience, it’s no different from a white person saying that black people just need to be polite to the police, the way they are. (As a teenager, I was regrettably that white person. But I’ve grown, and so can others in that situation)
unironically yes, you attack the status quo, that’s the problem. keep being the problem. fuck the status quo
The asymetry is unfair.
It’s also unfair that it’s spelled asymmetry.
so that’s a new way to be looking at things
Needs text alternative.
Images of text break much that text alternatives do not. Losses due to image of text lacking alternative such as link:
- usability
- we can’t quote the text without pointless bullshit like retyping it or OCR
- text search is unavailable
- the system can’t
- reflow text to varied screen sizes
- vary presentation (size, contrast)
- vary modality (audio, braille)
- accessibility
- lacks semantic structure (tags for titles, heading levels, sections, paragraphs, lists, emphasis, code, links, accessibility features, etc)
- some users can’t read this due to lack of alt text
- users can’t adapt the text for dyslexia or vision impairments
- systems can’t read the text to them or send it to braille devices
- web connectivity
- we have to do failure-prone bullshit to find the original source
- we can’t explore wider context of the original message
- authenticity: we don’t know the image hasn’t been tampered
- searchability: the “text” isn’t indexable by search engine in a meaningful way
- fault tolerance: no text fallback if
- image breaks
- image host is geoblocked due to insane regulations.
Contrary to age & humble appearance, text is an advanced technology that provides all these capabilities absent from images.
Who’s doing the shaming?
Why would we shame men in particular for non-consensual sex? Are the other genders shamed less for it?
I don’t think merely shaming for non-consensual sex is an appropriate response. Usually, a criminal offense leads straight to arrest. Aren’t convicted rapists usually stigmatized in prison & after release?
Altogether, a peculiar assertion.
‘Aren’t convicted rapists usually stigmatized in prison & after release?’
Many rapists never even get a prison sentence, even if convicted, which many are not. One rapist, Jesse Butler, recently got community service after a conviction.
Right, and no one’s shaming them?
Also
He was 17 at the time but initially charged as an adult.
A minor: charging minors as adults is unjust, and a sentence appropriate for minors should be expected.
And no one’s shaming him. Did you read about how violent the crimes were? Regardless of being 17 at the time of the crimes, the violent nature of them should require a bit more than community service.
- usability
I remember Janet Jackson showed me her gangly old titty.
she didn’t do that. Justin did. and fuck the media for gaslighting everyone and blaming Janet for existing with nipples
*powerful men
Yeah nah. Guys don’t have to be powerful to be abusive
To get away with it you do.
neither do women
Because cops don’t cover for other rapists and abusers by default. It’s why poor women are the only people safe from rape culture!
They absolutely do not, unless you start playing with what, ‘consensual’ means. They may feel more shame than those men do, but the kinds of people who grape others generally don’t feel shame, in general, so even that comparison is poor. Additionally, shaming isn’t the primary tool society uses to respond to grape, assault, prison, ostracizing or murder is, so like, so what is there less shame? Shame is what gets used when physical force isn’t acceptable.
shaming isn’t the primary tool society uses to respond to grape, assault, prison, ostracizing or murder is, so like, so what is there less shame?
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
grape
Stop self-censoring for fuck’s sake
but the kinds of people who grape others generally don’t feel shame
I think this is probably not true.
the primary tool society uses to respond to grape, assault, prison, ostracizing or murder is, so like, so what is there less shame?
Those tools aren’t equally available to everyone, they are expressions of power, which some people have access to more than others.
Christ, I wish people would learn to use proper punctuation. I had to read that run-on garbage like three times before I figured out what OP was trying to express (that is not how commas work). I’m still not entirely sure what is meant from the “so what” part on.
I usually skip over hard to understand posts. But if you are determined; you could feed it to a LLM and respond to whatever it translates it to.
I don’t think it would be that far of a stretch to have “consensual sex” include prostitution.
Hyperbole, surely.
I guess, they might not be talking about individuals, but rather humanity as a whole. So, if a person rapes someone and this becomes publicly known, they will generally be shamed more than a woman having consensual sex (even though some rapists also get to be president, I guess).
But across the board, we have insults that every kid knows, which equate to “woman having (consensual) sex bad”, as well as gossip of the like, and even men being shamed for going out with a woman who has sex.
Compared to that, rape is rarely talked about…I honestly cannot comprehend some countriea. Where I live, we don’t talk about rape because it’s a goddamn tragedy. You can jest or shame virgins or sluts because in the end it has little meaning - but rape isn’t a joke, damn it.
And it isn’t generally swept under the rug here either. Even if woman won’t drag you to court out of shame or guilt or anything, most folk who know will lynch you if they know what you’ve done.
Yeah, the complaint isn’t so much that we should be talking about rape all the time, but rather that we should stop shaming consensual sex.
Compared to that, rape is rarely talked about…
There are a few colorful insults on that. Maybe not as common, but that’s more the fault of unimaginative insulters.
What immediately came to my mind was the phrase, “A key that opens a lot of locks is a good key, a lock that is opened by a lot of keys is a shitty lock.” And generally, that’s something you’re a lot more likely to bump into than rape, which is a much more uncomfortable to talk about for a lot of people and so it’s almost never going to be brought up. Combine that with some rape cases that get swept under the rug with phrases like, “boys will be boys,” “she was asking for it,” or even something as outright cruel as “it’s the only way she’d get laid anyways,” and yeah, where OP is coming from isn’t too hard to understand.
Combine that with some rape cases that get swept under the rug with phrases like, “boys will be boys,” “she was asking for it,” or even something as outright cruel as “it’s the only way she’d get laid anyways,” and yeah, where OP is coming from isn’t too hard to understand.
And yet, cases of male victims of female rapists get “swept under the rug” basically 100% of the time, but the outrage toward that is non-existent, even though the also-swept-under-the-rug fact is that women rape men just as often as men rape women:
And now the real surprise: when asked about experiences in the last 12 months, men reported being “made to penetrate”—either by physical force or due to intoxication—at virtually the same rates as women reported rape (both 1.1 percent in 2010, and 1.7 and 1.6 respectively in 2011).
In other words, if being made to penetrate someone was counted as rape—and why shouldn’t it be?—then the headlines could have focused on a truly sensational CDC finding: that women rape men as often as men rape women.
The whole reason a woman raping a man isn’t simply called “rape” in these statistics is because of successful explicitly anti-male lobbying by feminists like Mary Koss, and NOW, who don’t think it “counts” as rape when the man is the victim of a woman.
As one of these male victims of a female rapist, it’s always extremely frustrating to see women complaining to men about things like under-reporting, or men who get away with it, when it’s so much worse for men and boys, that the average person believes that a female raping a male is something that is literally impossible.
A boy got molested by his female teacher, and she won child support from him! Could you in a million years imagine a male rapist achieving such a legal judgment from a girl he molested?
A boy got molested by his female teacher, and she won child support from him! Could you in a million years imagine a male rapist achieving such a legal judgment from a girl he molested?
While I think all your other points may have merit, I need to point out child support is the birth right of the child who exists through no fault of their own. Both parents owe regardless of the circumstances. So, yes, I could imagine that legal judgement by necessity.
Should be the state’s job to support the child financially in these circumstances, there’s nothing necessary about making a victim of rape financially burdened as a consequence of their being raped.
At least as a woman, assuming you don’t live in crazy religious places, you usually have the option of an abortion, as a man you are denied all agency
Nah, a child is entitled to full parental care. In cases of financial hardship, the state may provide support. Adoptive parents may takeover responsibilities. Whoever the parents are, though, they are responsible.
This consideration has nothing to do with abortion & everything to do with parental obligations the child.
checks notes
:(
Sorry to break it to you
