That’s the post. I had only dated bisexual men before and it was kinda nice to know that a person that really only finds women attractive finds me attractive. Chime in if you want to share similar moments.
That’s the post. I had only dated bisexual men before and it was kinda nice to know that a person that really only finds women attractive finds me attractive. Chime in if you want to share similar moments.
Men get erections due to emotional excitement; not necessarily sexual arousal.
I cannot wrap my head around where this was coming from or how you could possibly believe this was supportive. She made a post about a validating experience with a date, and you immediately thought to counter her validation? How tf is that supportive
misogyny, the usual
then she was emotionally stimulating as a woman which is still affirming.
Yeah?.. That’s what I was saying lol
It’s something that you would not have thought, let alone said, if a cis woman had talked about enjoying her date having an erection when they hugged. Your comment served no point except to diminish the positivity that a trans person was feeling after a positive dating experience. If you read the sidebar, this particular community is “a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people”
Nothing you said was supportive, and this community is not the place for it.
Thanks, Ada.
Oh no I absolutely would have thought the same way
It actually wasn’t my point but fair.
Speakthink before Ithinkspeak I guess.difficult to tell intent! no worries haha. sorry if that came off too snippy.
If that’s true… wouldn’t OP know this though? Why would you say this?
And don’t forget, transgirl boners only come from true love
Why would you write this
Its kind of rude to assume that an erection is due to sexual arousal. Men used to get bullied all the time due to this. Edit: and it’s really only stopped because men’s pants have been engineered in latest decades to help hide erections.
Why would you assume I wasn’t being supportive??
Ok, that makes more sense, but I don’t see that assumption in the original post. The word “attractive” has no inherent sexual meaning. That’s why people usually say “sexually attractive” or use a different world like “hot”.
If I may offer a suggestion for the future, try to think if your comment might need context. Your original comment has nothing, leaving it to the reader to interpret the meaning. And nobody is going to assume that you’re referencing a different issue if you don’t explicitly state it. Leading to the only reasonable assumption of it deconstructing the original post.
regardless, isn’t it weird to doubt the reason’s for someone’s erection when the reasons are being celebrated by OP? Like, if someone feels affirmed and happy about something, why suddenly apply skepticism towards it - even when warranted it’s still rude, and in this case it doesn’t actually seem that likely that an erection was due to “emotional excitement” …
That’s the thing about trans women, you can’t gaslight them about what it was like living as a boy or man, they also had involuntary erections and know what that’s like. When cuddling on a date, an erection is probably related to attraction … this doesn’t really need to be litigated (and if there is still a desire to litigate that and raise the nuances of why erections come about, it’s still basic politeness to recognize this isn’t the appropriate moment to do that in).
Trans people feel enough insecurity, tbh.
next ur gonna say misandry is real and black people can be racist towards white people lol
shut the fuck up honestly
Wait but… misandry is real and black people can be racist towards white people. Maybe you mistyped or something idk. Anyone can be a bigot.
misandry isnt real its a silencing tactic
reverse racism isnt real, its a silencing tactic
there is no structural, societal misandry ever-present, oppressing men
there is no structural, societal racism ever-present, oppressing white people
racism, like misogyny, is a structural and systemic hate leveraged against people, not a personal one
when men receive lower salaries than women, have lower rights than women, have their bodies policed like women, are treated like objects and property like women then we can say it is real
Downvoted because while it is correct, what you said, it is completely wrong to think that on an individual level persons cannot be misandric or racist to white people.
I get your point, but your original comment didn’t specify “societal” or “structural.” Of course there’s no systemic misandry or “reverse racism”, and the issues you mentioned are far more serious, by several orders of magnitude. Still, misandry does exist on an interpersonal level, and it affects real people. Dismissing it outright feels insensitive, even if it’s not comparable in scale or impact.
For example, toxic masculinity harms women much more deeply, but it also harms men. Acknowledging that helps men see that they don’t have to conform to abusive or repressive norms to be accepted. Rejecting that nuance risks alienating people who might otherwise support feminist goals.
I was in that position once. In my teens, internalized misandry kept me stuck in the right-wing pipeline and made transitioning an absolute impossibility. I used to be an enabler, I’m ashamed of my past, almost as much as teen me was ashamed of existing. But it is real and could have been prevented.
toxic masculinity is misogyny
men not being able to act a certain way because its associated with womans qualities and thus forcing them to not express emotions and be violent and controlling or otherwise theyre seen as weak for being “like a woman” is misogyny
men confessing their troubles is seen as effeminate because these are “woman” qualities, youre not “weak” and “emotional” like a woman. this is also misogyny
being shamed and repressed for having qualities that are perceived as feminine is misogyny. youre not being shamed for being a man youre being shamed for acting like a woman
the supposed existence of “reverse racism” ignores the inherent power/privilege dynamic that permeates our society, and acts like racism is on an even playing field, when its not. if a black person calls you a cracker, thats not being racist, its a reaction to the racism they have faced from white people throughout their entire lives, and their parents lives, and their parents lives, etc.
come back when they oppress your way of life, when they fire you from a job because the color of your skin. when they deny you healthcare, or genocide you because the color of your skin. when they throw you in jail with laws they created, and force you to do slave labour for years
you are confusing personal prejudice caused by systemic oppression with systemic oppression. personal prejudice is inherently not racism because there is no system of oppression against white people, and all racism is systemic.
I’m not disagreeing with anything you’re saying, I just want to clarify, because I think we’re talking past each other. I tried my best to express that systemic issues are indeed far greater and not comparable to these interpersonal ones. The point I was making, was that dismissing their notion outright as some false flag operation is hurtful and only deepens the actual systemic issues by alienating potential allies.
To explain why this dismissal matters, I will elaborate on my personal experience. This will be long and messy. If after this you’re still just restating the same point we both agree on, then it’s probably best to leave it there.
Being bullied for being “girly” and “gay” was the least of my issues, I could have kept living in my assigned role, even if unhappy. My real issue was me developing a seething pathological hatred for men. Society treated me like a threat by default, because of my assigned gender, and eventually I started believing it. That I was a literal monster, that it wasn’t just some expectation, that there was something fundamentally wrong with me, something seriously broken in my head, simply for being born male. I was never misogynist, in fact I always looked up to women. And yet, this belief of inherent wrongness, was my hook into the right wing. Teen me didn’t believe in trans rights, because he believed all “males” must suffer. He didn’t help anyone suffering from injustice, because he believed he was so exceptionally wrong, that self erasure was the best possible outcome. He believed in a strict hierarchy where his mere existence was a death sentence. He was a hateful bigot that celebrated cruelty. He became a part of the problem he hated so much. And all that could have been prevented if only a single person didn’t dismiss him. That was all it took to eventually heal me, one person showing compassion.
I sadly can’t say anything about racism, as that is simply not an area I have experience with, living in an extremely mono ethnic country (ofc as you mentioned, my ancestors might have a clue why that is). But it’s not hard to imagine someone developing similar beliefs when taught from a young age that some people are predisposed to hurt the things they care for.
That’s not exactly true, an erection can also just be a response to stimulus. Men can achieve erections while being completely unconscious.
Men achieve erections while unconscious regularly. Its part of the sleep cycle. Regular maintainace, keeps things functional for when needed. That’s why morning wood is a thing.
HRT stopped this for me, which is wonderful. Having a massive erection ruins a girl’s day right from the very beginning.
Unless the erection is on someone else. 🧐
Emotions still exist when unconscious. It’s just the brain’s prediction algorithm
Men also get erections when tired. What does that say, oh wise one?
Who told you this and why did you believe them?