Jeez. All you mean people.
I’d take the pink pill and help people with intestinal blockages and stuff.
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Do I want to commit murder? No.
How about protect your friends and family from a predator?
I’m not going to play this game. It’s the same game people play with me when I say I don’t want to own a gun.
I have never been in such a situation, so I have no idea what I would do. As it is, my large, mean dog would make it unlikely.
Just accept that not everyone shares your violent fantasies.
okay but what if it was a gun that made people have to poop
If take the purple pill, can I do that to anyone anywhere on Earth? Or just people nearby? Anywhere on earth, the purple. Just nearby, toss up between purple and a weed gummy. Do I know the strength of the weed gummy?
Even if its nearby… I’d visit every trump rally out there.
Assuming I could force somebody to poop on command with little effort beyond sheer willpower, I would absolutely take it upon myself to dish out petty justice with that power.
I see you being rude to people working in a service job? You get poopy pants.
I see you playing music on your phone or otherwise being obnoxious on the bus or some other public space? You get poopy pants.
Are you driving like an asshole? Following too closely? Cutting people off? Honking the moment the light turns green? Words can’t express the satisfaction I will feel in knowing that you’re now sitting in your car with the poopiest of pants my power could possibly muster.
I would immediately try to weaponize it. Spend a weekend making putin telepathically shit his brains out without pause should probably be enough to make him die from the sheer loss of matter and nutrients.
Death note but not cool
Brown note? 👀
PAUL MCCARTNEY: I’ll never forget the first time I heard the Brown Note. I’d been wearing my favorite trousers that day. At least they were my favorite trousers.
RINGO STARR: At first I assumed I was hearing one of John and Yoko’s weird sound experiments. After a few seconds I knew it was bigger than that. I mean the sound moved me — moved me bowels that is.
PAUL MCCARTNEY: A sound that makes you crap yourself? That’s the power of music, man. As soon as I heard it I realized: The Beatles gotta break up. Well, there were other reasons, but that was definitely a reason.
From, and continued here, for those interested in statements from other musicians on The Brown Note.
Putin, Musk, and Trump would wholly comprise my Shit List.
And Xi for good measure
Pink please…
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I love that ability. I always want greedy billionaires and hateful politicians to be made a fool of. Now I can do it with comedy.
No violence and death, just lots of dookies. Oh this is so fun.
I will just make every single human on earth poop every day at exactly 14:56 UCT
I wouldn’t say anything, and just enjoy seeing how people tries to figure out what’s going on. And maybe how a new religion is born of such a miracle.
That would destroy most places sewage systems lol
How does that work… spoken command? Is there a cool down on you/the victim? Can it be recorded/broadcasted? Does it has to be consciously be heard and understood or is it like the brown Note from Southpark?
Based on this, that power varies from nice/annoying trick to weapon of mass defecation.
Do they have to have poop in them or does it spawn some inside them? That’s necessary information.
I think it would be just enough to go for those massive diarrhea spasms where you no longer even have anything to expulse but your body keeps pushing. Although I guess it would be cooler to have a Tarantino level spray, choco edition.
Spawns inside of them. Makes them shit even more and harder tbh
This is among the shittiest color combinations for colorblind. I only see two colors of pills: something magenta-ish and something yellow-ish
I think that’s why they have words along with them? 🤪 (sorry)
Why would anyone choose anything but the magenta one?
Because you have the soul of a puppy and you can’t imagine harming another?
Screw that! I wanna make boom boom in others pants!
Definitely pink, I would be the most powerful man on Earth.
Why is this so funny? It’s fucking stupid 😂
blue, so I would finally have a friend
Gold made me think of this forgotten greentext.
What? Where I live pissing directly into watter is like the opposite. As my roommate once said: “Didn’t your father taught you how to piss or what?”
Real men piss the shitstains off the bowl without making a mess.
What about the ones below the water line?
Hold the tip closed until you build up enough pressure. Or just clean your damn toilet I guess.
