• hodgepodgin@lemmy.zip
    11·
    5 hours ago

    My friends joke about me being autistic (e.g. last get together) and I have to remind them I am not. I am really just poorly socially trained, which has the difference of being better at with time. Thing is, I talk to almost no one, so I am basically a baby raised by wolves. This is coupled with my social anxiety, but I am usually outgoing once I remove that limiter.

  • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
    3·
    5 hours ago

    I guess I’m good at masking, the first time someone called me autist was in 2024.

    Could also be that I’m not exactly very social. Could also be that most people don’t actually understand that autism spectrum includes people that are “almost normal”, not only the obvious “babbling weirdos”

  • tetris11@feddit.ukEnglish
    10·
    8 hours ago

    I asked that once to good colleague of mine because I was just so blown away by his attention to detail and ability to recall the smallest of facts at a drop of a hat.

    He went quiet, and I realised I’d goofed.

    I also once said “I need to rice this analysis” to an asian colleague of mine, without fully understanding what that word came from. Again, goofed.

    • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
      4·
      36 minutes ago

      As an ASD and a wordnik, ricing is a form of food prep homogenization, reducing a lumpy medium to the consistency of rice or finer, e.g. potato ricing.

      Maybe I’m missing a key element.

    • titanicx@lemmy.zip
      1·
      32 minutes ago

      Where in the world did rice this analysis come from? I have literally never heard that anywhere in the professional world or non-professional world. The only time I’ve heard the word rice being used in that instance is when they’re talking about Asian cars that are riced out example. I work in and out of a lot of professional places including laboratories and hospitals and I’ve never even heard a glimpse of that or anything.

      • tetris11@feddit.ukEnglish
        2·
        13 minutes ago

        I took it from “rice my config” to “yak-shaving my config” to “yak-shaving my analysis” to “rice my analysis”

        Essentially, I thought it meant “to finesse”. It instead means “form over function with racist undertones”. I am an idiot, yes

  • ruuster13@lemmy.zip
    52·
    14 hours ago

    That’s literally how I find my people. You know by how they say it if it’s judgmental or endearing… or you don’t and you just have to ask.

  • Ephera@lemmy.mlEnglish
    14·
    11 hours ago

    Many years ago, I was working together with a girl my age for about 3 months and I had decided pretty early on that I didn’t want to impress her, but that I would use the time to work on smalltalk and such. It was a factory job with lots of boring tasks, so there were lots of opportunities to entertain each other.

    After 2½ months, I felt like I was doing better than I’ve ever done in my life. Then she hit me with the sentence: “I don’t think any girl would want to go out with you, because you don’t talk enough.”

    So, basically worst case: That’s genuinely what she thought.
    ‘Best’ case: She was trying to hurt me, but well, she still knew which wound to poke into, so I guess, I wasn’t doing that great either way.

  • ICCrawler@lemmy.world
    31·
    14 hours ago

    The only time I’ve ever had someone approach me asking about my autism was from a fellow autist. Twas a good talk.

  • RebekahWSD@lemmy.world
    19·
    13 hours ago

    Sort of. It’s more like “I think I’m doing well socializing then I’ll find out later secondhand they think I’m a fucking idiot child and mocked me after I left.”

    And then I’m tired as hell to try again.

    • FosterMolasses@leminal.spaceEnglish
      6·
      5 hours ago

      For the record, that experience is also universal. You could be perfectly socially adjusted and you’ll still meet fake AF people on occasion. Narcissists have a habit of fawning to your face and then doing 180s on their opinion of you the moment you’re out of their line of sight lol. Don’t worry about it.

      • RebekahWSD@lemmy.world
        14·
        13 hours ago

        I still want to get better at socializing and it’s so difficult when neurotypicals act polite to your face and then do that! It makes to so hard to learn!

        • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
          9·
          2 hours ago

          It’s entirely fair to want to get better at it, but those people probably couldn’t help you even if they were inclined to, because they’re bad at socializing- they invited someone whose socialization style doesn’t vibe with their party, then their response is to mock the guest for their own mistake.

          Not everyone is like that, and not every neurotypical is like that. It’s hard to find a good group, but one exists for you.

          Also, specifically regarding learning to socialize: you don’t necessarily have to get help from neurotypicals- that’s like having a math teacher who’s just naturally good at math, vs one who had to struggle to master it. You learn better from the latter if you’re not also gifted at math.

  • xxce2AAb@feddit.dk
    13·
    14 hours ago

    Uh, n-no. Never!

    Admittedly, that might be because they never struck up a conversion in the first place, or just sort of wandered off swiftly while looking at me funny.

    Hard to tell.